Jonathan & I met in the simplest, most unexpected of ways. Simple because it all started with “hello”; unexpected because, well… we met on Myspace.
I had seen several male profiles — strictly for friendship, mind you — before I saw Jonathan’s. His absolutely captivated me. His photograph was artistic & thought-provoking, & the contents within his profile were quite the rarity (for me at least). The books he read, the music he listened to, his personal beliefs, the movies he liked — everything was so different from what I was used to in men. (What was I used to, you ask? “Movies: Anything with Vin Diesel; Music: ICP, Nickleback, Metallica, & Kid Rock; Books: I don’t read; Religion: blowing shit up.”)
But Jonathan seemed to have his life together; plus, he was bloody gorgeous. It all seemed to good to be true, but I wrote him a message anyway, introducing myself & telling him — in not so many words — that I thought he was dreamy. (A rather forward, daring move on my part.) Within a few days, he responded back & we made a date to chat online.
We chatted online while he was at his cubicle at work. The conversation flowed so easily that it almost felt like we had talked before. & at the end of the conversation — he was clocking out of work — he asked if he could call me. I said yes, gave him my number, & he called me that evening.
During our phone conversation, I remember being absolutely charmed by his voice. He had this eloquent way of speaking in which he would pronounce every syllable in certain words. It was such a unique way of talking that I thought he had an accent. I asked if he was born in this country (I thought his voice sounded German), but he just laughed & said “No, I was born in Arizona.” Regardless, I swooned a little harder.
We had a lovely conversation on the telephone; lovelier than what you would expect from us only having known each other for less than 24 hours. I was so comfortable with him. Granted, a little cautious (he could’ve been a serial killer) but comfortable, nonetheless. Before hanging up, he said “We should meet sometime.” I agreed, & the very next day we had our first date.
Now, at the time, I didn’t think it was a date. I just thought it was two people meeting for the first time, getting to know each other for a possible lifelong friendship. Nothing more, nothing less. I hadn’t thought of him in a romantic way at that point; not seriously, at least. I mean, he was cute & everything, but I simply wasn’t in the market for a new boyfriend. I was actually quite enjoying my singledom: the parties, the clubs, the flirting with strangers, the late night gossip fests. For a girl who had spent the better part of her teenaged years with a guy she thought she was going to marry, I was way behind. It felt so good to be free… & then, of course, it also hurt like the dickens, but I refused to acknowledge that part of it.
As I drove for over an hour to meet Jonathan for the first time, I was preparing myself for the worst. Part of me was still thinking that he seemed too good to be true. What if he is a serial killer?, I thought. What if he is a serial rapist? What if he is a serial killer who rapes his victims & leaves them for dead in an alley?! I was freaking out a little bit, for the simple fact that I had NEVER done anything so remotely trusting like this in my life. Having only met the guy a day ago, & I was now on my way to see him was completely out of the ordinary for me. In my mind, I envisioned that the outcome of this journey would be told in a Lifetime movie titled “Too Trusting: The True Story & Brutal Murdering of Ev`Yan.” I was seriously thinking this.
But then I saw him; standing on a quaint little street corner (now known to us as Old Town), smoking a cigarette, wearing a nice button up shirt with jeans. My heart immediately began beating so fast that it seemed to have fallen to the pit of my stomach, & in my stomach, my heart swelled with so much love for this stranger that I started to feel woozy. At the very first sight of Jonathan, I fell in love with him. (& this is coming from a girl who thought “love at first sight” was for pansies who actually believed in rubbish like that.)
From that first date on, we were literally inseparable.
The distance between us (71.6 miles, to be exact) was difficult, but we managed to spend every weekend together. He would ride a bus for 2 hours — because he didn’t have a car — to meet me at a bus station 30 minutes away from my house. Once he arrived, we would walk around a nearby mall until he had to be on the last bus back to Pasadena. Sometimes we would just keep my car parked at the bus station & stay there talking, dreaming, musing. Because it didn’t matter what we were doing; we just desperately wanted (needed) to be next to each other.
At 11:30pm, when his bus back to Pasadena rounded the corner, I would begin to cry soft, silent tears. They would run down my cheeks & into my mouth, & I would cry the entire way home. Every single time I watched him get back on that bus, I would cry. I would make this horrible scene as though I would never see him again. It was the most pitiful, strangest thing, but I couldn’t help myself. I was attached.
Sometimes we would decide at the spur of the moment to go to a cheap motel & spend the night there, even though we both knew he had to be at work the next day, on the opposite side of town; even though we didn’t bring a change of clothes; even though we it would only give us a few more hours with each other. (But we didn’t care.) & we spent the night at some of the most shabbiest, creepiest motels; the kind where killer hitchhikers no doubt go to hide away from the police. (But we didn’t care.) & in the morning, we would wake up bright & early (3:00am) so that he would make it to work on time.
We juggled this kind of sporadic, semi-dysfunctional relationship for several months, & we juggled it well.
When we grew tired of hanging around desolate bus stations & spooky motels, we would drive to my house, where my mother & sister lived, & Jonathan would stay the entire weekend. He spent Thanksgiving, Christmas, & New Years with us, even though we had only been dating for one month at the time.
It’s no stretch to say that our romance was quite a whirlwind. Everything happened extremely fast; almost too fast for a girl like me, who typically took her sweet, precious time in relationships. But the feelings were so natural & they felt so true that neither of us had time to ask questions. We just knew.
To give you an idea of how ridiculous this all was, our relationship time line went something like this:
- We first talked on the 7th of November (2006).
- We had our first date on the 8th of November.
- We had our second date 2 days later, where he met my family (my father included).
- We said “I love you” (& meant it from the depths of our hearts) on the 9th day we were dating.
- We were talking marriage seriously by month #1.
- By month #6, we were living together.
- By month #13, we were married.
Yes, we were fucking crazy; crazy about each other & crazy in love. & that’s what kept us going. Our feelings were so strong that nothing — not the distance, not the hardships, not time, nor money — would get in the way of what we wanted, which was each other. The quickness of our union didn’t make sense, but everything fit together so perfectly. Every bitter moment — the bus rides, the tears, the motels, the traffic, the early morning goodbyes — made our relationship stronger. Not to mention, they make for some very interesting stories.
(If you’d ever like to hear a story that involves a helicopter, some nudity, & being followed by said helicopter for a few miles, just let me know. I’d be happy to oblige!)
There are other specific avenues of our story that I failed to mention. Like how, on the day after our first date, Jonathan surprised me by purchasing tickets to a Death Cab for Cutie concert in January, fully knowing that Death Cab for Cutie was my favorite band, & fully believing that we would actually still BE together by then.
Or how, on our first date, he told me had “a surprise” for me, & proceeded to lead me through dark streets & badly lit alleys to his apartment, & I just KNEW that he was going to kill me. Eventually, we arrived at his place, which was a 200-year-old home currently being restored, but to me it looked like a deserted house where meth was distributed. He told me to wait outside & listen to his ipod until he came back with the surprise. But I frantically called my mother instead, explaining to her where I was, & told her precisely what Jonathan was wearing, just in case he offed me. & then he came out of the house with something behind his back… & he presented to me my most favorite book, The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.
Not only did I feel like an absolute moron, but I fell even more in love with him at that moment. I mean, really: who gives a girl a book for a first date present? It’s unheard of! Then again, everything about our relationship is unheard of.
But that’s why I like it. It’s us.
Hey lady! Hope you are well…I love this story. I think mostly always the best things (people, lovers, life experiences) are unexpected, intense, and fast. That’s what makes them so powerful and meaningful. Anyway, thanks for sharing how you both met! Take care- Mariel
omg…ev’yan! i know i knew the story but still, i totally have the happy, teary eye thing going. i love it. thanks for sharing!
Lovely, beautiful post (and relationship story!)
It’s so funny to think about how relationships come about, because like you I was cautious and moved at a snail’s pace when it came to relationships but sometimes there’s nothing like a whirlwind romance that moves you from the depths of your soul.
Thank you for sharing this story… and I’m curious about the helicopter story, too =)
Ev`Yan, seriously, you almost made me cry! Such a wonderful story, so well written!
xo
i LOVE you two. you’re perfect. xo
This story of how you met is beautiful. It should be made into a film. Who knew love at first sight really existed!
This post is AMAZING. Amazing.
Ev’Yan,
What a great story! Congratulations on finding The One!
I have to pinch myself every day when I wake up next to my guy. I also thought “love at first sight” was a bunch of baloney, but the moment I saw him, I just knew. And by the way, we just celebrated our 5 year anniversary last week, and your advice worked splendidly– it was a night of simple celebration & it was fantastic!
It’s amazing that even when things are going badly, when life is just taking a crap all over you, if you have someone who you truly love, and who truly loves you, to lean on, it all just seems less overwhelming.
Thanks for sharing your story!
<3 Marisa
wow. that sounds amazing. is there any age difference between you and jonathan? and I’d love to hear the helicopter story!
the love of my life & I have a similarly quick story. it was only after five days that he told me he loved me, seemingly out of the blue; after a couple weeks, he spoke of being together for “millions of months” in the future (since we both hesitated from the word “forever”). we celebrated every week because it had felt like forever. I lived with him for a couple of weeks after just being together for a month. but it felt so right that the time just seemed to be a random, insignificant factor. :)
@ Sui: When I met Jonathan, he had just turned 21 & I had just turned 19. :] (Our birthdays are 9 days apart; mine being first.)
I’ll be 22 in September, as will Jonathan, who will turn 24.
Beautiful story and beautifully written!
such a cute story! my husband and i have a somewhat similar story, except we met while i was on a myspace date with someone else *woops*
I’m guessing this is where your request for douche bag music came into play :) :) I loved your story!!! Me and Chris also met online but in a much nerdier way, hah!
What a beautiful, beautiful love story.
I love this. I love it because my relationship with my fiance is pretty similar, in that it all happened quickly, and it was completely out of my normal character to do such irrational things for a guy I barely knew. Oh, and you should totally write up that helicopter story and let me use it as a guest post for the week I’ll be on my honeymoon. :-P
um ev’yan this post just made me love you and jonathan even more and i didn’t think that was possible. you two are absolutely amazing and this story is incredible and seriously just love all of the love that is in this story. :)
Gah!!!!!!!
How romantic!
How insane!
How perfect!!!!!!!
I love your story- I actually though you were married in 6 months, not 13! Ah, the beginnings of things. You’ve gotta love them =)
Oh and yes! Helicopter story next please!
This is so sweet. I love reading about love, especially real love that works out! It makes me feel vindicated.
We have similar love lives…
I met Michael on Facebook, he met my family on our 3rd date, we moved in together after 3 months and were married after 24. I also think we both might have some crazy hookup mishaps worth sharing. Lol.
Maybe I need to write our love story down as well. :) Inspired!
Glad to hear I’m not the only one. We fell in love on a business trip and lived on other sides of the country (Chicago vs Miami). We met on June 17th, saw each other over 4th of July and he proposed on July 26th when I came for a visit. When then had to live apart for almost 9 months until he could move down to Miami.
We did some of those spur of the moment trips too but they involved airfare!
Keep the romance alive… we have our 12th anniversary this year.
http://shoedaydreams.blogspot.com/2008/11/living-fairy-tale.html
Luv
Poochie
I read this entire story with the biggest, fattest smile on my face you could ever imagine. What a wonderful love story. It seems way too good to be true, almost as if it was a modern day fairy tale but I love it! I’m so happy for you and your husband and for the genuine love you two have for each other. The best of luck to both of you <3
I’m usually just a lurker on your blog but after reading this I HAD to comment. You wouldn’t believe how much your story sounds like mine. I too met my King on myspace. He was so different from what I was used to in a man. In a lot of ways he is similar to your husband. He wants to make his living in non-traditional healing. After 6 months of dating we moved all the way from DC to Florida. Just the two of us now family, no jobs, just the love and trust we have for one another and the fact that we could make it. We just celebrated one year anniversary of our first date on the 4th of July. So don’t think your crazy. Love is the most powerful force in the universe. Although we aren’t married on paper our souls our married as we are connected
Oh i love this story!!
I love that it made me say aww, and omg! but also had me laughing and smiling :) love that!
you guys are adorable, and crazy, yes! but you know what? when it’s right, it’s right and you know! and besides what a fantastic story you have right?
and i agree with the others, i wanna hear the helicopter story! :D
This has put the MOST EPIC smile on my face. I love “how we met” or “how he proposed” stories, it makes my heart all warm like freshly-baked biscuits.
Oh wow, that’s such a gorgeous story (even better because it’s more than a story, it’s true!). You guys are so super adorable, and I’m glad that ‘Love at First Sight’ exists for some people :) And I’d TOTALLY like to hear the helicopter story!
girrrrl, dang you and your beautiful stories :) This story, like for everyone else, put a smile on my face and most importantly gave me hope. You know, sometimes thinking of finding love, you start to think it could never happen to you because you don’t do this or you don’t go there, all the “norms” to finding a guy. But your story reminded me that love truly comes to you, the one who is meant for you will come to you however, its that simple.
Thanks Ev’yan!
I knew the jist, but I LOVED reading this whole story. Absolutely beautiful, just like you. I miss you SO much and can’t wait to see you BOTH soon. :)
so i smiled..the entire time. it was indeed crazy..and fast. but still…amazing.
o and I’m Toi [toy] by the way.. i recently started following your blog && am trying to develop my own..for reasons of my own sanity and well being haha
Wow, thanks for sharing with us! Too bad your story isn’t a movie. It’d be a good movie. ;)
How did he propose?
Oh, and do friggin’ share the helicopter story!
Ev’Yan, I love reading all of your posts, and I usually don’t comment, but I just have to say how absolutely marvelous this post is.
Even though my marriage is ending, your story gives me hope. You and Jonathan have got to be one of the most inspirational couples I have ever come across. Your love deserves to go down in the history books.
Lots of smiles for you both.
my husband and i met on myspace :) lovely, wonderful things can come out of the most unexpected mediums.
this is a truly beautiful love story. I wish you guys the best :)
You know what? Everytime I think the notion of love and romantics, true romantics are dead, I read something like this and I do my dove coo of awww and hope is reborn. Just great.
Great post!!
Wow. That was so beautiful!
I love you two. So much. I’ve never known a more perfect couple.
Amazing story.
Wow, this was breathtaking. My own relationship is NOTHING like this — it’s slow as molasses and I’ve never had that one big “I just knew” moment. (I’ve had many, many little ones, so I guess that makes up for it.) That’s why it’s so cool to read of different types of romances, different types of loves. You two seem so meant for each other, it’s beautiful!
Ev’Yan…I too met husband online! Only, we met in an AOL chat room when I was only fifteen (I’m now twenty) ;). I almost got teary reading your story because it made me think of all the times that my then-boyfriend would take the Greyhound to come see me…only he didn’t live seventy miles away, he was from Nevada, and I, New York! He has taken the long, hot, three-day bus ride just to see me at least -six- times.
Your story, your blog, your fashion- everything has been a true inspiration for me, please don’t ever stop writing and sharing!
This is so sweet and resonated with me as my husband and I met the exact same way. I even stated in my wedding vows that “it all started with a simple “hello.” On Myspace. We have a one and a half year old and we just officially tied the knot May 2nd. Meeting, dating, living together and baby all happened within 3 years. I wouldn’t trade a minute of it for the world.
Many blessings to you two.
I LOVED THIS STORY. I would most definitely like to read the helicopter story.
Beautiful :)
Melanie Skinner
Hey Ev’yan, you can tell a story in such an emotional way, it’s just too beautiful to read.
While I was reading your story it reminded me of how I met my boyfriend almost 5 years ago, and how our relationship developped. I thought of telling you here in 3 short sentences but that’s impossible because it was kind of crazy like yours, too…
I wish you both the best for your relationship and please please stay as you are! I don’t know you but you must be such a special and warmhearted person, I would know you!
P.S. You first thought he had a german accent? I hate my German accent… :-/
Oh this is lovely :D
And very much like my husband and I! The distance, the speed of love, etc…Only he was the one who found ME on myspace, hehe.
Love is a wonderful thing :D
Rick and I have known each other for 21 months now…we’ve been married for 18 of them. I left my home country for this dude, and haven’t questioned it for a moment. I used to HATE when people said “when you know, you know.” But there’s really no other way to put it, is there?
Yay love.
this is so beautiful. im going to read it again. :->
very cute. i met my ex on myspace while i was in chicago, he was in virginia, then i moved to california. there were 2000 miles between us when we got to know each other and fell in love before even meeting. one month after meeting him, i moved to philly and lived with him. we’re not together right now, but he is truly my first love. my first great love. the idea was in my head and the words tossed around with others, but it was infatuation, not love.
our story seems crazy like yours, but yours might be a little more wild. :) i love it.
I adore this. Such a wonderful love.
I think I just cried. I love how you ended this with what he gave you on the first date. Talk about a way to a girl’s heart – find something she absolutely adores in the first few weeks of dating and give it to her.
I laughed and I “ooh’ed” and I “aww’ed” at this story. Absolutely loved it… You guys are adorable…one of my fave reasons for keeping up with your blog is anytime you tell stories just like this!
when it is right it is right…
similar to me… the first time I met my bf, I knew that he would be the last guy I’ll be with and he’ll love me forever.
It’s great to read about real love. Too many time all we hear is cheating men and dramafest relationships.
Awww! You guys are SO cute together! Yay for true love! I really loved hearing all about the story of you two!
I love that you guys met on MySpace!
As others have said — when it’s true love, you just know it … even if it looks “too soon” to others, you just know what’s right for YOU!
John and I also moved pretty quickly with some things…
For example, we moved in together after only dating 8 months.
Anyway, thanks again for sharing your story!
That is true love.
What a lovely story! Eric and I moved in pretty early too, and it has worked well for us!
I think you’re such a strong person, and he is such a thoughtful guy–a perfect match!
Reading this made me gush! I love reading stories of how couples met and fell in love.
Awww…
OMG, what a sweet story! I just LOOOVE it! I myself am married to my best friend- I too, for the first time ever (8 years ago) was brave enough to introduce myself to him on a whim! He was exactly what I asked for and came at exactly the right moment.
Your man is definitely a keeper. I have been following his blogs and tweets for a couple of months now and am truly inspired by his writing and his intent!
You guys keep on keeping on and continue creating new love stories to share! Big love to you! ~ Missy
judging by the number of comments, i can tell everyone is thinking the safe thing i am: simply beautiful.
all the best to you both.
I love your story, it makes me wish for a relationship as beautiful and natural as yours sometime in the future.
Thankyou for giving me hope :)
As always, your writing completely swept me away. I think you need to print this out to show future generations (if you don’t have children of your own, you can at least show neices or nephews…or my children…heehee). It’s just too sweet to keep to yourself, and I’m so glad you share it with all of us!
It is refreshing to read about other whirlwind relationships. My husband and I were engaged after two months of being officially “together” and I can completely understand those feelings of, “This is it. Why wait?”
You two make my heart melt into a puddle of happiness.
Gosh, this almost made me cry. And yes, the quickness that characterizes your relationship sounds totally crazy. So nice to hear, though. It gives some kind of hope for happiness, or at least the idea that some people manage to be happy.
how did i miss this until now! i love stories like this (well, stories of how we met, in general). i hate to say this and i’m ashamed but i might as well ‘let it out’ so i can detach from it [buddhist technique, you know.. :) ] i’m a bit envious of your story! this seems *similar* to how my ex and i met. i was very forward when i first saw his profile online and IMed him to say “you’re hot” which is something i’ve NEVER done and so out of character for me. our romance was also a whirlwind, and we spent every weekend together juggling 2 hrs apart etc. but alas, i know the similarities can stop there because something in your relationship WORKS which we did not have, at least to hold on to in the longrun. and i know those details are what make the difference. whatever that may be! and my details.. well, there are a bunch but i’m sure it’s completely different from your experience. :) i also have learned that those initial similarities (music tastes, etc) don’t mean you’re SOULMATES.. necessarily. but that juvenile basis CAN build on something great, although it’s not what will work for everyone.
Um…gorgeous story. Seriously, absolutely lovely.
oh Ev’Yan I LOVE this story! I mean, I am a huuuuuuugeee sucker for love stories, but yours is especially beautiful because it is about listening to your hearts and doing what you knew was right, despite set-backs and seemingly strange societal expectations. To be honest, I never would have understood how you could know you were going to spend the rest of your life with someone, that they were your perfect life partner so soon. But I do now. At some point about 2 months after meeting Erich I just knew I wanted to spend every day for the rest of my life with him. That he would make the hands down best husband, father and best friend. And there was no explanation to how I knew- I just did. And I imagine that was how it was for you a Jonathon. I love that. Yay :)
Wow, that’s a beautiful story Ev’yan
so romantic!
I’m sorry to spam your site, but so much of what you say resonates with me so entirely I feel like I need to comment on every post. I feel like I am almost reading my own stories, but in much more beautiful and eloquent words.
x
My boyfriend gave me a copy of A Lover’s Discourse on our first date, and then he gave me a book every other time we went on a date, for a month.
Needless to say, I had a lot to read, last summer.
(Your story made me smile all the way through, and when I was done reading I called my boy just to tell him I love him. I’m really, really glad you’ve shared such a beautiful thing)
(Uh, and I’ll be a faithful reader of yours, from now on)