Friday, May 30th, 2008
things go bump! in the night.
It is past my bedtime. Surely, I should be sleeping by now; I normally am. But with the combination of coffee ice cream & chocolate covered, peanut butter filled pretzels, I cannot stop my mind from whirling. I’ve been lying in bed for an hour or so, trying to get my thoughts to slow down just enough so that I can keep track of them.
Just as I was starting to drift off into some sort of peace, I heard very loud banging in the wall beside me. It wasn’t consistent — only happens every several seconds — but it was enough to keep me awake, guessing & agitated. It sounded as though someone was either rapping on the wall, or slamming a door in anger. I silently counted the bangs, saying to myself, Okay… if it bangs one more time, I’ll get up to see what it is. Alright… the next time I hear it, I’ll get up. Okay, if it gets so loud that it startles Sofie (my trusty shih tzu) I will certainly get up to investigate.
The noise wouldn’t stop & I was starting to get past my irritation & into the curiosity phase; what IS that? I pressed my ear to the wall (have I ever mentioned how curious & slightly nosy I am? I inherited it completely from my mother, for the record), hoping to make out something amongst the noise of the banging & Lover’s snoring. I heard yelling (or was it shrieking?) on the other end. Were my neighbors watching a game? No, it’s far too late for that. Maybe they were playing a video game. A domestic dispute, possibly? & then the banging started again, over & over. I listened closer…
It took me several seconds, but I finally realized what the banging was: it was a headboard hitting the wall in deep & powerful smacks. & the shrieking was none other than the pleasureful sounds of my neighbors getting it on — making love, if you will. Shamefully, I was more than interested to keep listening. Not in a dirty, nosy way (although, I have to admit… maybe just a little) but to hear just how other people get down. I have always been intrigued my the science of sex & this was really quite fascinating! Or maybe I am just terribly sheltered.
After a while, I scared my own self, thinking: My God, Ev’Yan! What a pervert you are! Geez. Lay down & go to bed, for Heaven’s sake! Then, I went from feeling guilty, to feeling aroused. My little mind then started to scheme ideas: Ooo, wouldn’t it be nice to have a lovely little competition with the neighbors? I bet Lover & I could be louder, rowdier & steamier. I bet we could win if we tried. I bet we could make it so good they would start back up again, getting off to our lovemaking sounds. I should wake Lover & proposition him into a sack session fit for an indiscreet diary writing. He might like it; a spontaneous romp in the covers. I don’t think he would wake up too grumpy at me. Yes, yes. I should wake him.
So tempting, so naughty. But unfortunately, between my sugar high & Lover persistently sawing logs, I couldn’t find it in me. I really wanted to do something; it seemed a waste not to try (I cannot explain why, it is just this way) but I couldn’t. Thus, here I sit like a lonely begonia, waiting for the caffeine crash & hoping to find some solace in entertainment on the internet, while Lover groans, sighs & stirs upstairs.
Sadly, I have yet to find any decent entertainment to keep me steady; except this late night perversion, of course, which helped my energy levels only slightly. But annoyingly, I cannot stop hearing the passion-filled shrieks & thrusting thumping. I’m not sure if it is my own wishful thinking or if maybe they still might be going at it. Whichever is truthful, one thing’s for sure: I need to take my gutter-mind & my potty thoughts to bed.
on Friday, May 30th, 2008 at 7:13 am:
You should have woke him up!!! :)
on Friday, May 30th, 2008 at 1:36 pm:
@ amanda: Sigh, I know; Lover read this today & said the same thing. He actually showed me your comment & said “SEE?! You should have!!!” ;]
on Friday, May 30th, 2008 at 4:43 pm:
Yum, coffee ice cream.
on Saturday, May 31st, 2008 at 6:18 am:
This is a funny little post! The same thing has occured with me in a hotel room.
on Saturday, May 31st, 2008 at 10:31 am:
Found you on 20something bloggers and am loving your blog so far. Yes just based on this one entry alone LOL.
I had neighbors who got it on very loudly every other night and I had no Lover in the bed beside me. This made for one very cranky Timah. You SO should have woken him up! But then again maybe it’s because I think the idea of a headboard banging competition between you and the neighbors would have also made for good blog material.
on Saturday, May 31st, 2008 at 11:49 am:
@ Natalie: I concur. :] Although, I hate how susceptible I am to a caffeine rush.
@ August: You just reminded me of another time where this happened to us in a hotel room. I think that was annoying, only because it was a run down place & God knows who was next door; it was kind of yucky.
@ Timah: thank you. :] I’m so glad you like it. & it totally would’ve made for good blog material. Next time… :]
on Saturday, May 31st, 2008 at 3:02 pm:
oh my! that’s hilarious! we have neighbors that live upstairs that CONSTANTLY fight. they just don’t stop and funnily enough it’s always the girl who yells the most and the guy who ends up crying. don’t worry, it’s just yelling and one of them usually leaves and comes back later…
and then we get to hear the make-up sex.
on Sunday, June 1st, 2008 at 6:31 pm:
Since you went there, I will tell you how I am always nosily listening in on strange noises from neighbors. You dont have to ask me why - you clearly got o hear what I am never sure I hear or not
haha
What does your hubby think of your nighttime entertainment?
It always tickled my hubby to see me press my ear against the wall wide eyed and saying “shhh.. what do you think THAT was?
:)