Saturday, May 10th, 2008
please, don’t try to style me.
On Wednesday, I got my hair cut. People argue that my hair was cute already (see below) but I beg to differ. I felt like it was “blah;” boring, lifeless, one dimensional. I couldn’t do anything with it. As much as I tried to embrace this page boy look — much like the daring & beautiful Agyness Deyn — I felt like it was taking over my face. I’d style it towards the front, like in the picture, but would end up getting annoyed at my hair tickling my eyelashes. By the end of the day, my hair would be brushed to the right side of my face. I didn’t see any point in keeping longer bangs, just for the sake of working so hard to grow them out. So, off they went.
the finished result:
As you can see, my hair is now choppy & cut very close; much shorter than I’ve had it in a long time, but not the shortest I’ve ever had it. I will be honest & say that I didn’t necessarily want my hair to be this short, but it’s my own fault for leaving my hair’s fate in the hands of my hairstylist (also known as my ex-manager.) She is a great stylist who does brilliant work, do not get me wrong, but since I know a thing or two about hair myself, I often walk out of the salon feeling as though I had been taken advantage of; as though my hair just went through the trauma of a rape. Either that of I think to myself, I could have done better. This is why I wish that I could learn how to cut my own hair, to save myself the trouble & anguish of discontentment. Everyone has their own opinion, their own way of looking at things. I was taught this is Cosmetology School. Everyone sees “pixie cut” in a different way. I know how I see it, thus the reason I wish I could do it myself.
Yes, I am a licensed Cosmetologist. My talents are now only being used to cut my own hair (the hair that I can reach) as well as my close family & my own husband. Otherwise, the rest of those brutal memories of cutting hair, coloring hair, perming hair, styling hair now sit in a few boxes upstairs. I will never be a hairstylist. Matter of fact, I was never meant to be a hairstylist. But it seemed like a good idea at the time. (More than likely, I’ll speak of this later.)
Either way; I always feel jaded while I am getting my hair cut because it seems as though people would rather see me in different styles other than the ones I sport now. “Put it in a mohawk!” some say. Oh, if I had a dollar for every time a person said that. “No, no, no. Do a faux-hawk! You would look so hot if your hair was sticking up all over the top of your head.” I am sorry, but that does not sound appealing to me. Not at all. As much as I try to convince people that it’s “not me” they never listen & it’s hard to stop their rambling about it until I walk out of the room.
My ex-manager started to do this song & dance on Wednesday. As she was cutting my hair, she began to fluff it upwards (without gel, because my hair is so lightweight), a big grin on her face, tilting her head side to side saying, “Ohh, yes. This is hot. This is so hot. You’re hot.” I just smiled, awkwardly, hoping that she’ll just get along with it so I can go home & fix it. But she keeps doing it; she even cuts my hair in a way that if I decided that I WAS going to style it on top of my head, I could at least have the option to do so. I didn’t ask for that, I didn’t indicate that I wanted that, but she insisted upon doing it, without asking me. Now, it’s always been hard for me to speak up & defend myself. Not because I don’t have a backbone — I can be downright vicious & malicious when I want to be — but because I don’t have the heart to hurt anyone’s feelings. That’s just simply it. But on this day, I was getting really tired of other people trying to tell me what looks “hot” on me & what doesn’t & I said straight out, in the most pleasant, lady-like tone of voice “I would love to wear this style, if it were me. But it’s not. I’m a bit more old-fashioned. I like to keep it simple. I think a mohawk would look horrific on me.” Unfortunately, despite my being brave enough to tell the truth, she wouldn’t have it. “But you really should just do it this way! You would look so hot; so, so hot. It would look BOMB, Ev’Yan! Why don’t you style it like this? You really should wear it up sometimes… you know, kind of like this… & then you could push this up! Ooh & you could wear this kind of jeans with that one shirt I was wearing the other day! Oh yes, so hot. Bomb.”
I just sighed heavily, plastered on my awkward smile & went back to praying that she would finish so I could go home & fix it. She continued to play with my hair, mumbling how “hot” my hair looked, even though to me, it looked like I stuck my finger in a light socket.
Needless to say, that sort of display of conduct annoys the hell out of me. & when I came home, I did fix my hair the way I liked it. Classy, simple & impish. I won’t have it any other way, even if it is boring. I don’t mind being boring. I also don’t mind being introverted. I heard it said once before that if you don’t like it, don’t look at it. Yes, do look away, please. & don’t touch my hair.
on Saturday, May 10th, 2008 at 12:09 pm:
Ah, I hate that. I had a similar experience months back when I went to go get my hair done. I wanted dark, she decided to add in blonde highlights along the front. I wanted short, she gave me layers. She wouldn’t even thin it out for me when I asked! She said it would make it “too thin”, even though every other stylist I’d had always exclaimed how thick my hair was. I can’t stand stylists like that.
on Saturday, May 10th, 2008 at 12:58 pm:
Well, your face is so pretty, you would look good with just about any style, really. Looking ferocious either way. :]
My stylist lady keeps saying that I HAVE to get my hair cut, but no, I refuse. I REFUSE, lol. She has short hair. She likes short hair. But it’s not for me at this point in time! Gosh.
(and yes, I am one of those people who also liked your Agyness Deyn look, hahaha.) Sorry it tickled your eyelashes.)
on Saturday, May 10th, 2008 at 1:39 pm:
I know what you mean about the discontented feeling upon leaving the beauty salon. Last time I got my hair highlighted there was a visible line in the back that I pointed out and she quickly explained it would “blend” pffft. I also hate when people tell me how to wear my hair lol!! BUT I think your new cut is very cute :)
on Sunday, May 11th, 2008 at 11:23 am:
@ sandy: I simply cannot STAND it when hairstylists feel like they will hold back from doing something that the client wants just because the stylist doesn’t want to do it. I loathe that. When I wanted my hair cut shorter, no one would do it… they felt uncomfortable. When that happens, I just stay persistent about it. Maybe even threatened to attempt to do it yourself if the stylist won’t cut it their way.
@ Natalie: thank you, lovely. :] Stay strong in what you want! Don’t let that stylist try to mould your hair, girl! Although, you would look cute if you had shorter hair.
@ abby: Thank you very much! =]
on Sunday, May 11th, 2008 at 4:31 pm:
I love it… however I totally understand where you are coming from. I have worked on and off at a day spa/salon for 10 years as the front desk girl :-) Lots of fun.
on Sunday, May 11th, 2008 at 8:39 pm:
@ Amanda: I know what you mean, precisely, because I used to be the front desk girl. :] It was an interesting job, just because you’re not necessarily IN the action, but you can get a ring side seat & say to yourself, “Better you than me” when that bitchy client starts coming in, or whatever. :]
on Thursday, May 15th, 2008 at 10:08 am:
Heehee. I love it when people think they know what’s best for you. (Sarcasm, obviously.)
I’m glad you’ve decided to be true to yourself and not give in to being completely “bomb”. I love your haircut - it looks perfect on your delicate features. I think if you went too funky, it would discract from your natural beauty, you know?
on Sunday, June 8th, 2008 at 9:41 pm:
Ok so you have a super cute cut. Girls that look so good with short hair, like you, make me want to cut my hair…btw I always saw your comments, but could never find your blog. I just finally came across it on Kitty kate’s blogroll. Love it.